He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
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