May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
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