My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
