Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
of course. lets lasso hookers.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
