I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
