dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
