Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
