he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
