i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
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