i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Randomize
