Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Randomize