aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize