i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize
