I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
