Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
We named our party play list daddy issues
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Randomize
