i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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