So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
