He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
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