ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
