I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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