I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize
