need another drink. this is the easiest way
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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