if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
