What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
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