Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
