There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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