Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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