you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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