3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize