what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Randomize
