Me. At least after what I've been through.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize