So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Randomize