I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
