That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
be right there i have to get my cape
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
