Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Randomize
