I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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