Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I pour the whiskey from now on
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
