everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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