my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize