i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
