Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
