Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
