OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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