I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
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