dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
