i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize