names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Sorry about my life...
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
