'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
