He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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