1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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