Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Randomize